Did Mary get stuck between Xmas and New Year?

I’m feeling a little blue

We’re in the 2nd week of 2014 and I should have made and tossed at least a dozen New Year resolutions by now. But I’m stuck.

I’m not ready for 2014. Not yet.

2013 was a good year

The book got done and sold out. I know … I know … I’ve harped on that enough already. But seriously it was a big deal.  I want to stay in with the high of that “birthing” a little longer, to feel once more that up swell of warmth in my chest when I held the boxy little thing in my hot hands. All that work, that revision. There it was, my baby!

My mother recovered from her three little strokes. Her medication’s all sorted out. She’s walking, albeit with a limp, and back at her thrice-a-week mahjong games. It was wonderful to see, the week by week improvements since October.

Middle Son got all his immigration matters sorted out and is nicely settled in his country of choice, Australia. That was a load of our minds.

We had a great house-party at Xmas with near and dear.  And then, to stretch the old year out, Heart Guy, Oldest and her Husband, Middle and Youngest and I had a lazy intimate 5 days at the beach in Central Vietnam doing nothing much at all.

On the ether, I enrolled in two online writings courses and met a tribe of wonderful fellow writers who supported my 2013 with inspirational posts and vulnerable sharings almost daily. . They have taught me about the other dimensions heart-to-heart connection can have. Their words have called me towards greater authenticity in my material living praying hours and days.

Yes, 2013 was indeed a year of many treasures …

Letting go is hard to do

But it’s almost two weeks into 2014 this morning. It’s time to let go of the old and embrace the the new. The Chinese and Vietnamese Lunar New Year, which follows on the Gregorian, is waiting impatiently for its turn. By end January, the soft sliding year of the snake will be making way for the year of the flying horse.

But I’m not ready to let go. I’m not ready for the upcoming months and their challenges.

Down is what I feel this morning. Down is where I feel like staying, snuggled up in my comforter, the curtains drawn, half dreaming.

My 85 year old mother’s readier than I am. She’s looking forward to a trip to the UK in the summer, to attend yet another grandchild’s graduation. It will take twelve hours on an airplane. Afterwards, she’s going on a bed and breakfast tour of Southern England. Back in end September, when half of her wasn’t working properly, we couldn’t have hoped for half of that. But there she is, her plans all set, giving us instructions about her hotel bookings and telling us to surf the net for the cheapest air-fares.

Middle Son’s all set too. We sent him off at the airport last night. He sent a text this morning saying he’s arrived home safely, his home. Settled now, his dissertation done, he’s starting on the next phase of his life. He’ll be looking for a “proper” job, the one he attended university to train for.

My Singapore book-distributor, my US agent, the company secretaries of the corporate boards I sit on … They’re all set too.  My calendar’s fast filling with appointments. Heart Guy and Oldest Daughter have already put in their requests for the Lunar New Year Menu. My tribe-writer friends are on their 2nd and 3rd posts about New Year. There are the empty pages of 2 new works-in-progress waiting for me …

I need to get off my ass and start 2014. But here I am sitting … still sitting …

Did Mary have post-Xmas depression I wonder?

What about you?

17 Responses to “Did Mary get stuck between Xmas and New Year?”
  1. I have to tell you quite honestly, I don’t feel down after Christmas. I have a great feeling about this year, and some solid goals I want to achieve. I can understand why, after such a jam-packed year and the success of your book, you might feel a little let down though. Kind of the low after the mountain top experience. I’m sure you will be back on top of things in short order, maybe this is just time to rest and regroup.

    • Audrey Chin says:

      Yes Kathleen, I can see from your blog it’s going to be productive for you.
      I know everything has a season and it does feel like I need to slow down. I just wish my various schedulers aren’t so trigger happy about pencilling things in. One of my new year lessons must be learning to say no;)

  2. It’s natural to feel down after all of that excitement. I’ve been there many times. Give yourself time to regenerate your batteries. Knowing you, it won’t take long. Snuggle under the covers, do some reading, and do lots of daydreaming.

    • Audrey Chin says:

      I’m reading your book, Naked Lobster. Whizzed through it once and am now going through it slowly to make comments.
      It’s good;) It would be better minus 15000 words. I like all the characters now so the problem is which bits to cut.
      I don’t know why I keep thinking Caramel is part of Thomas … I know he isn’t but somehow it seems like he’s got a bit of that “hanging around” aura that Thomas has too.

  3. HI Audrey and happy new year to you – maybe it will all work out when the flying horse arrives and you can leap off side saddle! As a Mary in real life, whose birthday happens on Holy Innocents’ Day (really) between Christmas and new year and is regularly forgotten by almost everyone, even on Facebook, I sympathise with that head under the covers feeling – usually. But, having just started life in a new home among trees (OK and golfers!) for once I am relishing both what is around me (even the packing boxes!) and the opportunity to sneak into a bit of writing without feeling irritated at it. You’ve had all those people around and they’re gone – it’s inevitable you’ll feel a bit of a come down from that. But you are a busy soul and it will soon be forgotten.

  4. Janelle says:

    Although I don’t feel this way this year, I have in years past. Be gentle with yourself, my friend, and ease as sweetly and slowly into the new as you need to. Starting a year with sabbath is not a bad thing:)

  5. storiesworthsharing says:

    Snuggling in bed with a comforter and a good back sounds like a great way to start the new year. Seriously, though. You’ve really had a tough, full year and are entitled to some down time. Actually, sounds a bit like postpartum blues to me. 😉 Let yourself relax, and I’m sure that this time next year you’ll be writing about another wonderful, successful year. With your heart and your talent, it can’t be otherwise.

    • Audrey Chin says:

      Yup Mirel, post-bookpartum blues. But I’m supposed to start readings January 22nd at a university in Singapore, then go to Myanmar and on to Virginia. People have been so helpful and responsive with Virginia I can’t help but be motivated. So, yes … I’m gradually getting out of bed.

  6. Mc says:

    Sometimes it’s good to just sit … and sit. Especially after such a hectic 2013. I am constantly reminded to slow down and enjoy the moment – whatever that may be or entail – and how refreshing it has been for me when I do that.

    Enjoy the sitting, my friend.

    • Audrey Chin says:

      As you know dearest Mame, Monday we’re back to work – on the Viet kids. But you’re right, I need to pace and remember to take lots and lots of sitting breaks.

  7. Audrey, I hope you have had a chance to re-charge, let go of the old. January is looking withered and past her use by date already…….Live each day and treasure the fact you can. Another year of magical writing ahead of you.

    • Audrey Chin says:

      Thank you Kath. I’m beginning to suspect its the new drapes we put into the bedroom. We used to have roman blinds which let the light in at the edges. We’ve got drawn across the windows curtains now and the room is DARK. I’m going to leave the slightly open. Nothing like good bright sunshine to help start the day.

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